Lessons from my garden: Focus

A couple of years ago I did a series called Lessons From My Garden. Somehow I am constantly seeing life lessons as I tackle the challenges and bask in the joy of gardening. It is one of the most humbling of passions, as there are so many things which all of the watering, nurturing, weeding and mulching in the world cannot control.

A few weeks ago when I posted these photos of my flowers, I have to admit that I giggled at the kind comments. What I knew is that my garden looked like this:

Lots of green, healthy plants, but practically nothing blooming. That Jacob's Ladder in the middle was going like gangbusters, however, so it made a nice photo. And some of my containers had a few things going. I chose to focus on the color, rather than the lack of it. Indeed, my irises never bloomed this year. Two varieties of them that have always bloomed in years past. Nothing!

Well, almost nothing. This ONE flower bloomed.

On June 10th. AMAZING that it picked that day!

It deserved to have its picture taken.

Do you see what kind of help I'm getting? This guy is lounging, GRAZING in my garden. I have several impatiens plants along the front of the garden that are completely healthy and full of buds. Each day he and his buddies come and clean up those new little nasty flowers for me. Isn't that special? I have a couple of great bunny chasers, and when absolutely necessary I even dash out there in my bathrobe, but they are not to be deterred.

Here is one of my containers. Do you see that daisy at 12:00? The zinnea at 1:00? Covered with buds. But are they blooming? Nooooo. Are there rabbits on my deck too??? I don't think so. It looks like there is some hope for the showstars. And finally the gazania came up with a flower for me today.

But hang on...

That's quite a flower!

It was worth the wait!

"...be content with what you have,

because God has said,

'Never will I leave you;

never will I forsake you.'"

Hebrews 13:5

So where's your focus? Is it on what you don't have, or on what you do have?

I have to ask myself that question frequently. It's easy to look at my kids and answer that question for them. It's harder to be honest with myself about the truth of the matter. I try to think about how I would fill in this blank: I'll be happy when ____________. If I can easily fill in the blank, I know my focus is in trouble. "I'll be happy when my flowers bloom." Well, what if they don't? My irises didn't. Why would the others be any different? What I'm really saying is, "I'm leaving it up to my flowers to determine whether I will be happy or not. I am choosing to be unhappy if they don't bloom."

Now obviously I'm not going to choose to be unhappy if my garden doesn't bloom. I will be pleased if it does. But I love flowers, and I can find some flowers blooming around here to enjoy, even if some of my favorites don't.

What if your blank includes the name of a person? "I'll be happy when my kids stop bickering." There's trouble. Is it really my kids' responsibility to make me happy? No. And do I really want to choose not to be happy unless they stop? Who loses then? I do. We all do.

So there's what I was thinking about as I weeded, fertilized, mulched and sprayed for bugs in my garden today. Because those are the things I CAN control. I pray it helps me stay focused on being content with what I have. AND on the God who will NEVER leave or forsake me.

More lessons from my garden:

Hope

Growth

Different Gifts

Brokenness

Relax!

Expectations

Appreciation

The Color Purple

Things That Last

Improvise

Lessons from my garden: Brokenness

There is something I try to remember to tell myself, that I have also begun to tell my kids. Things are not always as they seem. You never know what makes people act the way they do. What broke or spilled or frustrated them this morning. What run in they had with a family member. What illness or difficult circumstances they are dealing with.

This picture reminds me of that. Two identical iris plants. One looks lush, green and healthy. The other looks scrawny, weak and thirsty. But I know why. I divided my irises this year. They were huge, and well developed, so it was time to break them apart at the roots and replant them. The sick looking iris has been broken. The mature looking one in the back was actually the smallest plant in the garden, and looked to me not quite ready to be divided, so I left it alone. The divided ones may not bloom this year. They are busy reestablishing their roots. In time they will be more beautiful and prolific than before.

May people deal with me graciously when I am broken or reestablishing my roots. And may I do the same for them.

Lessons from my garden: Expectations

It happens every year. I forget what plants I had the year before that should be coming back. And then one appears that I hadn't expected, and I get so excited. Once in awhile, it really is an annual turned perennial. (Bethany has a huge dianthus like that in her container.) I love it when that happens! But if you have any experience in gardening, you know what I'm about to say--it's usually a weed. This year I thought a verbena had come back in one of my containers. It's this gorgeous green plant, complete with scalloped edges, just like a verbena. But the other day I was in a greenhouse, and noticed that those scalloped edges on the verbena leaves really didn't look like mine, and they were much smaller and more delicate. And not in threes. Duped again. So the next morning I went out to take one more look and think about getting it out of there, when WHOA! Here were these gorgeous raindrops painted exquisitely on the tips of those scallops--not at all what I had expected! What a wonderful surprise.

Expectations. You know, our whole attitude towards life really boils down to how we manage our expectations. We are big on teaching our kids that, "Godliness with contentment is great gain." (1 Timothy 6:6) But it is sometimes hard to model. We easily fall into "discontentment thinking". "I can only be happy if..." or "I am not happy because..." or "I should have had..."-- that sort of thing. Weeds in our garden of thoughts, if you will. A recipe for a great loss.

When we find ourselves out of sorts, it's pretty easy to sort out by asking, "What was I expecting?" Often we expect people to meet our expectations, and they don't. But was it a reasonable expectation? Did I communicate the expectation? Did the other person "sign up" to meet it ? And sometimes our circumstances fall in place such that some time or money or other resource or anticipated event we expected to have doesn't materialize. Some of our choices are no longer available. And then one choice remains: will we choose contentment, or discontentment?

"I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." Philippians 1:20-21

What are you expecting?

P.S. The faux verbena is history. But there is one just like it in Benjamin's container. I'm leaving it right there to see what it becomes. And to see if it collects any more raindrops.

Lessons from my garden: Stages

This lantana is my favorite plant of the year. I am amazed by each of its beautiful stages. It reminds me of the people who are some of my heroes. They are the ones who have been through the cycle of parenting babies to adults and can still say, "Every stage was my favorite!" So far, it's true for me (both about parenting and about these flowers), and I pray that when my kids are grown and gone, I will have appreciated each one of the stages of their lives for its full beauty.

Right now I'm just thankful that even though they're getting so grown-up,

they're not too cool to have their picture taken with Pablo. Life is good!

Lessons from my garden: Growth

What do you see in this photo? I see a fabulous Mother's Day present. It took me a couple of years in this house before I realized that my crab apple tree was near full bloom every year on Mother's Day. We actually have four of them, but the one in front is by far the biggest, and I can hardly get enough of it in the short time it's blooming. It's a nice enough tree anytime, but for about a week each spring, it is GLORIOUS!!

I'm thankful for the eternal God who has been around long enough to see the big picture. He sees us and our circumstances from the perspective of completion. I'm so glad that where I see my own immaturities, he knows his plans to nurture and enable me to grow. "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6

Lessons from my garden: Things that last

"The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever." Isaiah 40:8

Our flowers experienced a little frostbite last week, and some of them fell indeed. For the rest, it's just a matter of time. I spend a lot of time tending them. I want to transfer much of that energy this gardening "off-season" into things that will last forever.

I have already joined a Bible study for the year, and am excited about learning from the book of Daniel. But it would be easy just to zip through the homework, enjoy the discussions, and not let it make a lasting difference in my life. Having the kids in school affords me much more freedom than I have had in a long time, and it would be SO easy to let it slip through my fingers on a little of this and a little of that. I am praying that I will have the discipline to exercise the freedom to be still and know that He is God...to know more of Him than I have ever known before. Pray for me!

A tree for all seasons

This tree's claim to fame is certainly

its spectacular spring display

but lately I have been enjoying

all this fruit

weighing down the limbs.

Once upon a time, a long long time ago,

I had a series of posts called

"Lessons From My Garden".

Today as I enjoyed my crab apple through my lens

two verses kept running through my mind.

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;

but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised."

Proverbs 31:30

"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity,

but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline."

2 Timothy 1:7


Lord, make me 
a woman for all seasons. 
 Amen.

Lessons from my garden: Improvise

If there is still snow on your garden during Holy Week, it's probably a good time to pick up a bouquet of flowers at the grocery store.

Lessons from my garden: Relax!

A garden is a perfect place to slow down and enjoy a tea party with a friend!

Lessons from my garden: Hope

"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly." Romans 5:1-6

This is one of my favorite weeks of the year. This past weekend there was little or no sign of life on the trees. Now some of them have little tufts of leaves, and others are filling in. By this coming weekend there will be color everywhere. Each day brings major change. I love how the brown gives way to a faint green, which brightens and fills in, and then gradually mellows into the deep, cool shades of summer.

Every year at this time, I find myself thinking of hope. Those lifeless branches of winter have actually been nourishing the life that would erupt at just the right time into the beauty of spring. They always do. While God's love is unchanging, he created seasons for us to remind us that after winter comes spring. Our lives are ever-changing, but even suffering leads to hope.

Forties Top 40, #33

#33:  Gardening.

I started gardening the summer I turned forty.

I've blogged about that many times in the series "Lessons From My Garden".  

These gorgeous crocuses reminded me.  (They are not mine, but the photo is.)

I've already been poking around, moving this, weeding that.
Dreaming of what is soon to come.
Love it.

Lessons from my garden: The Color Purple

The color purple must have been one of God's best ideas EVER! (This photo courtesy of one little girl who absolutely MUST pick the flowers, and one mom who is still learning to go with the flow...you know, when life gives you the blossoms all picked off your hostas, make a fun picture out of it.)

Lessons from my (neighbor's) garden: Appreciation

It never hurts to TELL your neighbor how good she is at something. In this case, roses. (You never know when a vase full of them might show up on your kitchen counter!) :-) Gifts appreciated are more eagerly shared.