Tuesday, April 5, 2011

No one prepared me for this

I think it is safe to say that spring has arrived.  Not that anything is blooming yet (except some crocuses that I saw yesterday), but the snow is almost gone, and the kids are playing outside.  THEY are definitely blooming. Life is so good!


Spring is always a busy time, so yesterday I was making sure my calendar was up to date, and mentally preparing myself for the faster pace.  Even looking forward to it.  I was looking at this handout that Ben's teacher gave us at conferences and double checking to make sure I had marked all the dates.


And then it hit me.


It's not so much the visit from the middle school counselors,
or really even the graduation.  
I am looking forward to the new challenges for Ben.  He is ready.
I thought I might fear the teen years, but really, watching our kids grow is 
the most amazing and exciting thing I have ever experienced.  
I think even I am ready.

Here's what hit me:


I am a little nervous that we are going to a place where
is no longer a recurring theme.


I have been hanging out with these guys since they were LITTLE.
To the teacher in me, they have sort of been my class.
Except that when I was a teacher, I never had the joy of watching them grow up.
They kinda stole my heart when I wasn't looking.
But now they will go off to two different schools
and I will begin to lose track of some of them.

And these girls?


They're only a year behind.

I did not grieve my kids going to school.  Watching them get on that bus to kindergarten was honestly the thrill of a lifetime for me, because I think schools are some of the most awe-inspiring places on earth and I could hardly wait to share that with them.  Obviously I knew they would finish elementary school and move on.  But I had no idea how emotional it would be for me.

"Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."
Psalm 90:12


Betty said...

And then come the years they leave for college...even worse yet. :)
Sorry don´t want to be downer, but I completely know what you´re feeling.
All you can do is enjoy them while they are still there.

Givinya De Elba said...

Oh. Wow. So far I'd managed not to get sad about this, but I am quite happy to add it to my list now. It is 5.5 years away for me, but 5.5 years AGO he was a baby. And that certainly went fast!

I'm like you - I've never (yet) grieved my kids going to school but these sorts of things will be emotional for me too.

StitchinByTheLake said...

Every change brings new emotions, some good and some not so much. But junior and senior high school kids have their own blessings for us if we just watch for them. You'll love it - really. blessings, marlene